I Don’t Want To Forget Her

Last week an unexpected, yet, answered prayer happened. I was able to fly to Denver to visit my mom and a few of my siblings, thanks to my husband’s boss whom couldn’t use her ticket voucher that had to be used last week. So, she generously offered it to us.

My total time there was an exact 48 hours, I’m not complaining, because any given or free given amount of time to spend with my family is precious.

My brother Tracey, who has been recently diagnosed with an ascending aortic aneurysm (please pray for him) picked me up from the airport. I drove his Jeep in the snowy, slushy weather to the nursing home where my mom has been for the past 2-3 years.

Arrived at the nursing home and walked to her room. She was lying in her bed sleeping. I gently whispered, “mom. mom.” with a soft patting on her leg. She opened her eyes with a large gasp and a “Oh honey!” I hugged her and cried my eyes out. She didn’t cry. Since her stroke, she hasn’t shown much of a tearful emotion. Which may be a good thing, otherwise it would be an ugly mess every time one of us kids leaves the nursing home!

We walked around the nursing home. She introduced me to all the staff and her friends and pointed out the ones that are “trouble”. I showed her pictures of the princess and 3 jesters. She doesn’t remember their names or ages. She also didn’t remember my husband’s name.

I went back to the nursing home the next day with my brother and sister. We took our mom to lunch and had fun reminiscing about our childhood. I loved seeing my mom laugh while we shared our stories. She also shared of what she remembers of all of her 7 children and the trouble we, I mean the other 6 would get into. I’m the 7th child, the baby, so of course, I was the most well-behaved. 😉

My time with my mom was short. But, I soaked in every second I had with her.

I hated to leave her.

I don’t like that she has to be in that nursing home.

Being miles away from her, it’s sometimes easy to play out of sight, out of mind.

I don’t want to forget her, before she forgets me. 

It hurts not being a consistent, every day role in her life. It hurts that she doesn’t know her grandchildren. And that they don’t know her.

I don’t know how much longer she has with us. Or when the day comes when she really won’t know who we are, if she ever gets to that point of  illness.

Having lost my father while miles apart. It bothers me that I will have to live through that again with my mom.

Until I can get back to Denver to see her, I’m thankful for the phone calls I can make to her and the Skype calls I get while she is with one of my siblings. Yay! Technology!

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One response to “I Don’t Want To Forget Her

  1. Pingback: Kudos To God | Just A Juggling Act In A Circus

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